People Who Say They'll Do Something, Then Don't

I know some people who, instead of just being honest up front, tell you they'll go somewhere with you or they'll do something with/for you, but they have no intention of doing so. What's their problem?

Just tell me you can't
Do you think I won't survive?
Passive aggression

People Who Don't Send Thank You Cards

Wording Dervish, why do some people think it's acceptable to not send a thank you note when they receive a gift from someone? It's just wrong. A haiku please.

A thanks would be nice
I know what your next gift is
Thank you cards. Booyah!

People Who Drive Slow in the Fast Lane

People who drive slow in the fast lane. -S.M.

Move over so we can pass you
Behind you, we taunt and harass you
You're clueless and slow
We've somewhere to go
In thinking, my dog can surpass you

People who Patronize the Elderly

When twenty-somethings patronize the elderly with comments like, "Aren't you cute!" and "Good job, sweetie!"

Do not patronize
Everyone deserves respect
Old people can punch

Words With a Silent P Sound

Words that/which (you choose and let me know why!) begin with a silent "P": Psychiatry, psaltery and psalm give me an itch only your limerick can scratch. - B

Dear B, I'd say "that" because the h in "which" is silent and I don't want to send you into a tizzy. Here you go...

There's a P in some words you can't hear
This consonant will just disappear
Like in psalm and psyche
But not the word spiky
Whoever wrote these loved their beer

Drivers Who Don't Yield

My pet peeve is people who ignore yield signs while driving. Are they stupid? Illiterate? Rude? I don't get it. I don't care if you write a haiku or a limerick, but please soothe my anger.

You just passed a sign that said Yield
It's in plain view, not concealed
I'd like to not die
As you rudely drive by
My road should not be a mine field.

People Who Don't Pick Up After Their Dog

Dervish, why do people think it's ok to let their dogs poo willy nilly and not pick up after them? Would they like me to poo in their yard? I think not. A haiku please.

I keep my lawn nice
And don't poop in your front yard
Pick it up, moron

Why Don't Others See That My Dogs is Best?

Dear Dervish, I have, by any objective standard, one of the world's most comic and charming dogs. My peeve is this: Why is this not obvious to everyone else?

Anyone should see
My dog is superior
Kids? Why do you ask?

Parents Who Bring Kids to Inappropriate Movies

Parents who bring their toddlers to in-theatre movies riddled with sex and profanity rather than sacrifice the popcorn money and get a sitter? C.L.

Sitter cost too much?
Tickets and popcorn paid for
You should not have spawned

Toothpickers Who Redeposit Their Find

People who upon completion of a meal pick their teeth, find some debris and put it back in their mouths. This is truly disgusting. Really. Stop. - A.B.

I saw what you found in your tooth
Picking teeth is truly uncouth
Then you swallowed your find
What is wrong with your mind
I'll now move to another booth.