Instant Messengers Who Can't Let Someone Else Have the Last Word

People who don't know when an IM is over and keep adding things to hear themselves type, i.e., "k," "will do," "lol." Enough already. Get the message? I'd like a haiku, please. -A.B.

Hey, IM buddy
you like to hear yourself type
OMG. STFU.

I Instant Message You and You Come See Me in Person. Don't Do That.

People who work in the office next to me...and I mean the next office over on the same floor in the same building, not the next building, and upon receiving my IM, immediately walk into my office to talk about it. I'm IMing you for a reason, dumbass. Beat it.

If I wanted to talk face-to-face
I would have walked over to your place
I instant messaged you
Why can't you get the clue?
What did I do with that can of mace?