My Mother-in-Law Sighs All the Time

I hesitate to ask you for a pittance since you've already done so much for me. I have so very many pet peeves, but my current front-runner is my mother-in-law who sighs all the time. She sighs when she sits down; she sighs... when she stands up; she sighs when there's a lull in the conversation.

I'll record you and then you will know
How often you sigh, you're a freak show
You breathe in and out
Good thing there's no spout
Wish I had a balloon you could blow